halloween and floating heads

my throat is aching. i think i have tonsilitis... aarrgghh!!! i'm drinking warm chamomile tea which i hoped would make it feel a bit better but i'm just feeling nauseated by the smell and the unbelievable sweetness of it. sorry for those offended, i'm a coffee addict and somehow i'm craving its bitterness and strength. tea is messing with my head.

its technically nov 1, halloween, all saint's day. later, we're off to visit mama's grave for about as long as it takes to eat a box of pizza then leave of heat and other imagined complaints. i don't like being there much. i feel as if i'm the worst daughter ever to walk the earth but that's how i feel. when there, i stare of to space not knowing what to think, what i should be thinking, what i should do or what i'm supposed to be doing. i find myself staring at the candles flames and looking at butterflies and dragonflies flitting by or the trees around. then i think, 'what am i doing here? she's not here. she can never be summed up by the words on the engraved marker on her grave. no amount of candles and flowers and time spent feeling stupid, fidgeting in the heat, wanting and not wanting to cry will ever change the fact...' i should be shot now.

...

just got back from lunch break, a creepy one at that. and since it is technically a holiday, canteen's out. we (four of us) went out walking to the nearest open gas station with an open foodshop(that does not need crossing a street to) and sort of hung out there while eating microwaved lunches we definitely would have gotten cheaper if we only had enough premeditation that there would be no food.

going back, a funeral car passed by with a coffin inside. trying to be funny, we pointed it out and joked about halloween and everything. jakey screamed and we all started laughing. i think the only scary part of the funeral car is that it only has one light at the back. we were laughing all the way to the building when friends from the other company (and other floor) called me over and panickedly asked me to wear my clothes inside out immediately. i laughed, i mean: who wouldn't. then they told me why... apparently, one of them (myla) saw us walking back and saw me without a body. i laughed again but was a little disturbed. they were damn serious too, so i flipped my jacket and left.

it reminded me of the elevator ride at the beginning of shift. i was in the elevator alone and distractedly called for my floor (5th). i thought to myself, 'what if i was haunted here...?' again, i was alone, the elevator should only stop at the fifth floor especially since the only ones in the building at night either belongs to the fifth or sixth floor. then it opened on the second. i didn't look up but i knew no one was there. i closed the door immediately. then it opened again on the third, again, no one was there. i closed the door immediately, stared at my phone and waited for my floor. when i got in the office, there was almost no one in... it was just then that i remembered shift was moved to eleven pm and i was an hour early! aaarrgghhh!!!

nothing else happened. (except for someone still yammering to flip my clothes...)

soundtracks...

Hmmm… No updates. Don’t worry, no one who’s remotely interested missed anything. Life is life as usual: crummy, boring, a bit expensive and usually filled with crap. Work on nights, sleet at day then wake up midafternoons to a blaring stereo of neighbors competing with malls in celebrating christmas early by repetitively playing sexbomb’s christmas album that, if you ask me, doen’t feel christmasy at all.

I suddenly remembered I have a blog when some spammer or something commented all about skin problems or whatever. I never realized I spoke about skin care… but what the hey!!! New age, new type of spamming. (and kim, that was the first laguna trip: just me and tres… I really wasn’t on the second one – actually second for this year? Never mind…)

I realize, I’m slowly depreciationg and missing tv. I’m currently obsessing on perusing through one of my favorite show’s episode summaries and transcripts ang today, I actually really considered not going to work to watch Nat Geo’s docu about The Da Vinci Code… well, of course the thought that I need to used up all my remaining leaves by early next year also crossed my mind and the fact that its utterly boring at work at this moment did traipse around dancing and singing in my mind (with a tail, a three pronged fork and cute horts on its vampiry head)

I finally fulfilled one life’s dream: I fianally got myself a rubik’s cube so I could conk it on the head of a stupid person or just throw it to a wall in frustration. Yup, I still haven’t figured it out yet. I’ve considered googling for solutions but wouldn’t that be cheating? Besides I can’t understand the mathematical permutatiions and the supposedly easy to understand directions. Why, oh, why did I have to leave that blasted thing home…? Well, at least I have another thing to waste time on. Next, I’m getting a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle that I’m conveniently going to lose pieces of and therefore have a valid excuse for not finishing it. Uhm, yes, I am that pathetic. I go to work to finish a book saved on my pc, beat that!

I’m ranting. I’m bored. I’m listening to Audio Werks Studio’s Cruisin Themes from movies, specifically the tango song on that Arnold Schwazzenegger and Jamie Lee Curtis danced to at True Lies, a movie I grew up with… I’m still guessing where the other themes are from and what scene it is… There’s leche flan!!! I’m in luck! Have I ever told anyone how much I love that stuff…? It’s so cold in here.

I obviously have nothing to say but can’t stop trying to be coy and witty.

I’m gonna stop now.

Or not.

Now, it’s the theme from Titanic… sheesh!!!